I'll never tell
by deb8inglife
Summary: Lydia Dumbledore is hiding a big secret, but now its starting to haunt her in her dreams. Maybe someone who has gone through the same thing can help before someone gets hurt. MalfoyOC. R&R. Flames welcomed.
1. The story begins

Lydia Dumbledore  
  
Author's note All Harry Potter characters are owned by J.K. Rowling and I have no power over them. All other characters were made by me, and are owned by me.  
  
I would like to take this time to say that this story is dedicated to Queen of Serpents, my friends, and anyone else who knows what its like to be trapped.

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Prologue: My life is over.  
  
Who am I you ask? Well, I'll tell you. My name is Lydia. You have probably seen me sitting all alone in the back of class. Did you ever bother to talk to me in-between classes? Did you ever cross the great hall to come say hello? Did you ever notice me, a useless Gryffindor girl? No, I bet you think you have me all figured out don't you. You must think that just because I'm Dumbledore's granddaughter that life is easy for me. Well, guess what Malfoy, the misery that is my life is not tangible enough for you to grasp.  
  
Chapter 1:  
  
Well, reader I guess I have to start at the beginning for you to understand. My name is Lydia Dumbledore, and yes I am Dumbledore's granddaughter. My father is his son. My grandmother is dead. I am a sixth year in Gryffindor house. I don't have any real friends. Sure, Harry Potter and his friends are in my year, but they are just polite to me. Their not what I would call friends.  
  
It was the first day of school at Hogwarts and I was already panicking . I had sat alone in one of the train compartments. I wasn't upset about that. I like to sit alone. When I'm alone I don't have to worry about acting up to normal standards. No, I was upset about what had happened while the train headed for Hogwarts.  
  
A couple hours after the train had left platform 9 and ¾, Draco Malfoy, and two of his friends I had never bothered to learn the names of, came into my compartment. He just barged in and sat down. His two friends just stood by the door as if the were guarding a prince from potential terrorist. I had been reading _A Girl's Guide to Fishing and Hunting_.  
  
For five minutes we just sat in silence. I was reading, and he was just sitting.  
  
Finally he opened his big egotistical mouth and said, "So are you actually planning to go fishing and hunting at Hogwarts?"  
  
I was in no mode to be joking around due to... other things. I simply said, "If you have something to say than just say it. I'm not leaving this compartment. Besides don't you have a Slytherin Assholes Inc. meeting to go to?"  
  
The little ass just smirked at me and says in a innocent voice, "My goodness, temper, temper little Gryffindor. I am a prefect and can put you in detention. So you just might want to show a little respect to authority." Now in a more serious voice he says, "I just came to see for myself if you really were as witty and intelligent as Professor Snape said you were. To tell you the truth you really haven't shown it during Potions and Care of Magical Creatures. My whole house thought that the only reason you passed your exams was because you are Dumbledore's granddaughter."  
  
I was shocked. I knew that I wasn't dumb. I would give Hermoine Granger some competition in class if I ever bothered to raise my hand. I was left dumbstruck because Professor Snape said I was smart, but in order to keep The Deception of my life a secret I just smiled.  
  
"What in bloody hell's name are you smiling about?" he said, a little upset because he hadn't managed to get on my nerves. Did this little idiot really think that I would let some stupid remark like that get to me after I had endured much more?  
  
"Because its good to know that I am important enough for you and your friends to spend time talking about me", which was half true. For most of my life I have been ignored because I really have lost all the people skills I've ever had, partly because I never bother to socialize. So I began to think that now would be a good time for him to parade around the corridors of the train. "So if you don't mind I'd like to be left alone. You wouldn't want your reputation to be soiled would you?"  
  
"And why may I ask, would it be soiled?"  
  
"Well, it wouldn't look good for the Slytherin King to be seen sitting in the same compartment as a Gryffindor. Besides if you came to pick a fight go find someone else. I'm not going to because I have better things to do."  
  
He just looked at me as if I was crazy. He got up and turned to leave. As he got to the door he looked at me and said, "Snape said you were an interesting character to look into. I think he may have been right. We'll see what skeletons you've got hidden in your closet won't we?" He gave me one last smirk and just left.  
  
I was so confused. I had been acting stranger at Hogwarts. If any of my old friends could see how I am now, then they would say that they didn't know me. Only, that was because things at home got worse. I knew that Grandfather was worried about me, but would he get Snape and the other Slytherins involved? O shit, why now were things getting more complicated at home and at school?

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A/N: Ok that was not what I expected, but whatever. I'm going to give you all a spoiler so you can understand what is going on. Lydia's home life was never the best, but now it's getting worse. Her classmates are starting to see things are wrong for Lydia, but they don't know what those things are. Dumbledore and Snape get help from someone else who knows what hell can be like. I think your all smart enough to figure out who that person is.

All this is going to get explained in the future. I just wanted to say this to get you guys into my story. Since I only have one chapter this spoiler will be up. As I write more I will take it down so please R&R. Flames are welcomed. Just say whatever you want. If saying nothing is what you want to tell me than that's cool too!

Later


	2. feasts and dreams

Author's note All Harry Potter characters are owned by J.K. Rowling and I have no power over them. All other characters were made by me, and are owned by me.

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We arrived at Hogwarts and I had managed to get a carriage for myself. My secret was to be the last person off the train and the last person to need a carriage. So step one to avoiding every human being till tomorrow was working. Step two was to skip the feast.  
  
I had skipped every feast in my first five years except for my first that included the Sorting Ceremony. Its not liked anyone ever noticed. My grandfather has way too many kids to look after to give me a second thought. Then there is Harry Potter, that boy needs a lot of taking care of. Especially since Voldemort is back.  
  
I crept into the girl's bathroom on the second floor. That was moaning Myrtle's bathroom. I was the only one that ever went in there. I was on her good side because I always went to hide there so I talked to her. She didn't mind me coming all the time because she felt pity for me due to my lack of any social skills. I guess she was really the only friend at Hogwarts I had.  
  
"Hello Myrtle how was your summer?" I asked her when I walked in. She looked a bit happy to see me. I guess after all these years I was the only friend she had ever had. She knew I hated to feasts and could always count on me coming. This bathroom was the safe haven for the both of us.  
  
"It could have been better. Oh I was so alone. No one bothered to come see me. No one cares about poor, miserable, mopping moaning Myrtle." She said with a pout.  
  
"Myrtle if you want company so much the why don't you go to talk to the other ghosts?"  
  
"Oh that is rich, this coming from the living anti-human girl."  
  
"Well it is obvious that you want other company, but for me yours is enough. I don't want to be with other people. I'd rather be left alone."  
  
"But what about your grandfather? Don't you want his company? I know that he loves you. I know that the only reason that you come here is to have time alone." She said in a voice barely above a whisper.  
  
She got me there. I didn't know what to say. I hate lying, but sometimes the ability to lie is what kept me alive. Of course me with my big mouth had to say, "It's better and safer for him to be away from me." Oh shit, why did I have to say that?  
  
"What do you be its better and safer? I always knew that there were things that you weren't telling me. You not as much like stone as you think."  
  
Ok now what the hell was up with all this cryptic stuff from everybody? "Myrtle what are you talking about now?"  
  
With a smile she relished the fact that for once she knew something that I didn't. Laughing she said, "You think that everyone ignores you because they don't know or want care about you. People don't know what to say or do around you. Look at yourself, you can't hide things very well. People can see that you always have things plaguing your mind. What those things are is a mystery to all. They are just too afraid of what you will say to them. You look like one of those people that think very deep thoughts. I've been dead long enough to know that now since your older people just might want to see what those thoughts are about."  
  
Myrtle stared at me for a long time. I didn't know what to say. For the first time Myrtle was lecturing me! And the worse thing about it was that she most defiantly enjoyed it. Then suddenly she had a frightened look on her face. She gasped and plunged into the toilet she had died by. When I looked behind me I also had to gasp. Professor Snape was standing right behind me.  
  
"Hello Miss Dumbledore what are you doing here?" he said to me and then he put on what was suppose to be a fatherly face. Let me tell you, his face looks better when its not trying to be nice.  
  
"I was just going to the bathroom Professor. It was a long train ride." What in name was he doing here!"  
  
"Indeed, and the I suppose you got sidetracked and decided to have a nice chat with a ghost."  
  
"Uh, yeah that's what happened I wasn't feeling very well and um... Myrtle was telling me about the time she got a very bad stomach ache..."  
  
"Please Miss Dumbledore I sincerely doubt that. You don't talk to the living, why then would you bother to talk to the dead?"  
  
I defiantly knew where this was going. He would walk me off to the feast. Those things would last for hours. Hell like I'm going to go in there. Plus it would draw more attention to me if I just happened to walk right during the middle of it. I had to head him off right here, and I knew the perfect excuse, "Please Professor I have my cramps and they hurt like hell," I made a face of torturing pain, "Their really bad this time for some reason. Could I just go and lie down in the hospital wing, and maybe Madame Pomfrey could give me some medicine." This is the only reason why cramps are useful.  
  
Snape looked embarrassed and sounded nervous when he spoke, "Well I don't see why not..." then he mumbled, "Seeing how it is an emergency you should go to the hospital wing." with that he turned and left.  
  
Ahhh that excuse worked like a charm. Guys are never able to handle it. Even though I hate lying, I have to say I am sooooo good at it.  
  
I left the bathroom because I had to make it convincing. Snape might ask Madame Pomfrey later if I had stopped by.

* * *

I left the hospital wing and walked up to Gryffindor Tower. When I was in the staircase I felt like all the portraits were eyeing me. Maybe I was just being paranoid. I went to my bed and found all my stuff resting next to it. I said a little prayer and fell asleep.

* * *

_Screaming, there was so much screaming. "Stop, please stop" I yelled as loud as I could.  
  
The sound of flesh being smacked was ringing in my ears. My sister was on the floor. My mother was surrounded by shards of broken glass. My father and brother were fighting.  
  
And I was huddled by the stairs.  
  
I closed my eyes. Someone grabbed me and threw me across the room.  
  
"You piece of shit. Your nothing" please make him stop someone.  
  
My sister's voice screamed, "Leave her alone all she is doing is crying. If you want to hurt someone, hurt me, but don't you ever in you fucking life touch her again."  
  
The screaming of my mother drowned the shouts of my brother and sister out.  
  
"You asshole look what you've done!"  
  
"Don't you ever disrespect me again!" more shouts can be heard.  
  
I just cave under all the pressure and I just scream and I scream and I scream.  
_

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A/N: hope this chapter is appealing to the masses. Now that Lydia is at school things can get interesting. 


	3. Runaway

Disclaimer: I obviously do not own any of the Harry Potter characters. I own the plot and any characters that do not appear in the Harry Potter books. I will not put this disclaimer up in future chapters because it's a waste of my time writing it over and over. I trust that all of you are smart enough to know that this applies to all of my chapters.  
  
A/N: Thank You to killrgcriotgirl for being my first reviewer. I know there are other people out there who are reading this story. Review if you want to, but it does help the creative process if you do. If you don't want to then that's ok. I'll just never be able to thank you, or care about your opinion.

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I couldn't stop screaming. I was shaking. I didn't have control over my body anymore. I felt someone pick me up. I couldn't see who it was.  
  
"Lydia! Lydia! Stop! Wake up! Parvati go get help! Can't you see she is in a state of shock!" the bossy voice of a girl was shaking me harder that by body could. I think it was Hermione Granger. I did share a dormitory with her, Lavender Brown, and Parvati Patil.  
  
Suddenly the urge to vomit overcame me. I managed to get away from Hermione and hold on to something that felt like cold stone. I was near a window. I opened it and let myself vomit. I still couldn't open my eyes.  
  
"Is she conscience Miss Patil?" a concerned voice asked. I knew it had to be Professor McGonagall. Damn. These people really should've learned to become sound sleepers.  
  
"I can't see!" I said hoping they would help me on that part. I realized that I was crying. Double damn. _I_ really should've learned to not cry.  
  
I felt someone hold my face steady. I stopped shaking as much as before. Although my face was having a spaz attack.  
  
"Now, now it's all right. You're just having a nervous breakdown. You can open them. Give them a try." Professor McGonagall I could see how you were trying to be nice, but that moment I needed to get away from you people.  
  
I tried to open them. Damn again the lady was right. I saw the scared look of my roommates and Professor McGonagall's concerned look. Agh. The door was open and I saw the faces of some fourth years and the Weasley sister staring at me. I went and shut the door in their faces and locked it. I slowly turned around and faced the older woman and three girls.  
  
"What happened?" I said in what I hoped was a commanding voice.  
  
"Don't you know? I mean that is the question you really should be answering." Hermione was trying to get me to talk. Boy did she pick the wrong person.  
  
"I asked first. Anyway the reason I am asking is because I want to know what you know."  
  
"You started screaming." She said while twisting her hand. She was nervous. She probably thought I was crazy. I made a mental note to remember her reaction. She continued, "It woke us all up. You then proceeded to shake violently. You cried and screamed so loudly. I'm sure everyone in the castle heard you. You were so loud and we didn't know what to do. I grabbed you and tried to wake you up."  
  
"You did." I interrupted her. I was leaning with my back to the door and my head resting on it.  
  
"Oh well good" she said even more nervous like. The she finished her story, "I told Parvati to go and fetch Professor McGonagall. You shoved me and stumbled to the window. You threw up and Parvati came back with the Professor. And that's all." She said lamely. She then started to stare at her nails. Another nervous habit she and every other female on the planet posesed. The other two girls stared at the floor. I guess they really were very determined not to look me in the face. As if this were all their fault. Professor McGonagall just looked at me.  
  
"I think we had better take you to the Hospital wing so Madame Pomfrey can have a look at you. After that I will take you to Professor Dumbledore's office. I'm sure after he hears what happened he will want to have a word with you." Professor McGonagall then walked over to me.  
  
I held out my hand to stop her from coming any closer. I told her, "I already went to see Madame Pomfrey today. I had a stomach ache earlier and she gave me some medicine."  
  
She looked me straight in the eye and said, "Well I still would feel better if she had another look at you."  
  
Hell no over my dead body. As if I would go down there again. Who knows what kinds of potions she could have to make me talk? I walked to by bed grabbed my wand, then I turned around, unlocked the door, wretched it open, and shoved the kids that were in front of the door. I ran down the staircase. As I ran down to the common room I saw that I had awakened the whole house. Many faces stared at me as I ran. When I got to the common room I saw the Weasley girl talking to Harry Potter and Ron Weasley.  
  
"What happened?" Harry Potter asked me with a look of concern. I saw what looked like pity on Ron's face. After that something inside me snapped. I didn't need anyone's pity. And since when did Potter or Weasley give a damn about me.  
  
"You know what its nothing of your god damn business. So leave me the fuck alone." I yelled. I got to the portrait, opened it up, left the tower, and then performed a spell on the portrait I had read about. This was suppose to keep anyone from getting in or out for about an hour. Enough time for me to think of something.  
  
Down the corridor and out into the Staircase Hall I ran. I was so terrified that I would meet a prefect along the way. When I reached the Entrance Hall I saw about three of them talking. I would have to do something to distract them. I looked closer and saw that they were two Slytherins and a Ravenclaw. By now I had realized that Professor McGonagall could leave the tower by floo powder. Damn she was going to tell my Grandfather. I had an idea. A ghost could help me.  
  
So I had to run back to the second floor. I ran into the girls' bathroom. Myrtle was hovering above a window.  
  
"Myrtle I need a big favor. Please come help me its urgent!" I pleaded.  
  
"All right what do you need? I would be happy to help you."  
  
"I need you to distract some prefects so I can get out of the castle. Just for the night. Please Myrtle they're going to come looking for me any minute." I was frantic. McGonagall must've talked to my Grandfather by now. The prefects must've known to search for me.  
  
"What did you do?" she said with interest. The ghost just didn't understand how I was desperate to get out of there.  
  
"Never mind that right now I'll have to tell you later. You know I will. Now hurry and follow me!" I raced out of the bathroom. I turned around to see if Myrtle was behind me. Thank God she was.  
  
We reached the Entrance Hall. Now there were about six prefects and damn Professor Snape and Professor McGonagall were talking to them. I raise and finger to my lip and gave her instructions.  
  
"Now Myrtle I need you to appear out from the doors and ask what they are doing." I said as I pointed to the small (well to me not so small) group. "If they are talking about me say that you saw me down by the lake. If they don't ask say you saw a student, then say my first name only, down by the lake. Keep them distracted for as long as you can. I am going to go down to the Forbidden Forest. I'm going to sneak by Hagrid's hut. What ever you do make sure that they do not see me. I owe you something."  
  
"No problem this will be easy. Actually it seems quite fun to be doing some mischief." with a wink I saw disappear under the floor.  
  
I kept thinking, please Myrtle don't screw this up. Hurry please hurry. A few moments later I saw her float through the doors and approach the group. Some more time passed. I saw the group walk out through the doors, out onto the grounds.  
  
I walked up to the doors once I was sure that everyone was gone. I carefully opened the doors and snuck out. I saw that Myrtle had indeed gotten the prefects and professors to head down and search the lake. I went the opposite direction. I lurked in the shadows and said a thank you prayer. There was no moon tonight. The light from the Castle made a pathway of shadows that I could walk through without being seen. Then I finally reached the forest by Hagrid's hut.  
  
"_Locomotor Mortis!_" a voice shouted. I was trapped me in the leg-locker curse. I lost my balance and hit the ground. Whoever did this to me would have to watch out. I was so close to reaching the forest. Damn whoever trapped me. I looked up and saw the little idiot. Malfoy had me trapped.  
  
"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't go and call Snape or McGonagall. Did you know that they are down by the lake with other prefects looking for you? You are in so much trouble. Not only did you leave your dormitory after hours, but you were heading for the Forbidden Forest. I've been in there and trust me you don't want to go in there."  
  
"If you call anybody I will get back at you. You don't know who the fuck I am so you better not mess with me. Let me go or I will be forced to bunny hop into the forest, and when I get out you will be in for hell." then I spat on him.  
  
"_Fuck watch it!_ Can't you tell I'm trying to be nice! Its not easy to be polite to a Gryffindor, especially one who has a foul mouth." he was starting to look pissed, but I really didn't care. "Besides I think I would rather enjoy seeing a Gryffindor bunny hop like the little bunnies they all are."  
  
I started to laugh, "I'm a girl idiot. I really don't give a fuck if I look like a bunny."  
  
"You know Snape said not to be to severe on you, but I'm beginning to think it really doesn't make a difference."  
  
"Snape told all of you to be nice to me!? What about McGonagall what did she say?"  
  
"She just said not to hurt you and that you were pretty weak right now considering you had just vomited any lunch that you had left in your stomach. Snape said you didn't go to eat dinner tonight. Tell me is that how you keep a nice figure by being anorexic and bulimic?" he said with an air of interest.  
  
"Of course I'm not. Look I'll make you a deal. I need to go into the Forest. I'll do anything if you let me go and say that you didn't see me." I was pleading to an ass, but I was desperate.  
  
"Well I would like to have my own mistress." he said with a smirk.  
  
"Aw hell no, send me to the headmaster then." as if, this guy had to be dreaming.  
  
"Fine I'll think of something. Where did you learn to talk like that? God I thought you Gryffindors were all saints." he muttered the counter curse and I was able to get up from the ground.  
  
"I live in New York City during the summer. My parents own a Penthouse suite. I just live there because my father has to do business all the time. When I was little we did live in Surrey. We are a pureblooded family. And no I am not a saint." I said as I massaged my arm.  
  
"Is your family rich?"  
  
"Yes, but my father is careful that we are never in the news. Thank you for letting me go. I'll figure something out to repay you with."  
  
I ran into the Forest without looking back. As I ran down a familiar path I felt tears fall from my cheeks as I thought about my father.

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A/N: ok that's the end for now. Thank you to any people who review. It really it good to know that at least _someone _is actually reading this. If you don't review then whatever. Flames are welcomed. 


	4. Aftermath

Chapter 4: Aftermath

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"Ugh" those were the memorable words that came out of my mouth when I woke up. I looked around. I had fallen asleep in a tree. As anyone who has spent half the night in a tree can tell you, it is not the most comfortable thing in the world. I felt like I had gotten drunk the night before. My right hand was cramped and numb because I had held tightly to my wand as I slept. I tried to remember what happened to get me in this tree. Then it all came flooding back.  
  
"Great. I just screwed myself. They are gonna kill me if they find out that I spent the night in a tree in the Forbidden Forest."  
  
What to do now. I was already in big trouble all because I had to avoid any questioning at all costs. I had no choice but to go back to the castle and act like nothing happened.  
  
I went up to Gryffindor tower. It was empty. One quick glance at the clock told me that I had missed my first class of the day and was late for Potions. Wonderful, not only was I late to the class of the most hated man (not including Voldemort) in Gryffindor house, but also one of the teachers that was out looking for me yesterday. Well, I reasoned with myself, I should at least look decent so they won't know where I was. And if they do ask I'll think of something on the spot.  
  
On the way to the dungeons I saw Peeves. He was laughing about something. Probably some poor first year got detention. He said some stuff to me, but I never listened when the poltergeist talked. Then I reached the door to the potion's classroom. I was so scared as I turned the handle, but I knew I had to move fast. I looked at the lovely grime covered floors as I rushed for a seat in the back of the class.  
  
"And where have you been Miss Dumbledore? You are twenty minutes late. You should also know that I had a grand total of three hours worth of sleep last night because I spent the remainder of the evening searching for you." His voice was so cold and it sounded like he was really pissed off.  
  
Damn and I was half way there. I looked around the room. Everyone was staring at me, including Malfoy. He had a big smirk on his face. Along with all the other Slytherins, he looked like he was really enjoying the fact that I was in so much trouble.  
  
"I slept in," I said. That was half of the truth anyway.  
  
"Yes, but we shall have to talk after class about your midnight walk. Now have a seat and 50 points from Gryffindor for being 30 minutes late." He resumed looking at his desk.  
  
I was so mad. Who the hell did he think he was? Granted he was a teacher, but still that was a large amount of points he took from us. I also knew that Professor McGonagall was going to take points off later as soon as she had me for class. So while I was reasoning in my head I stared with my mouth wide open at Snape. The Syltherins were chuckling now.  
  
"Yes Miss Dumbledore is there a problem?" said Snape.  
  
"Yeah! Why are you taking house points? That's penalizing the whole house! They didn't even do anything!" I was shouting now, "Why can't you just give me detention like a regular teacher would! Why do you always have to take house points? You are a teacher, you aren't suppose to be biased on these inter-house competition."  
  
"Are you through at yelling at me yet?" he said.  
  
"Yeah, but that's because if I said the rest of what I was thinking I would probably be expelled." When I said this some people actually dared to go "oooo". This was responded by a glare from Snape.  
  
"Miss Dumbledore if you do want your wish to come true then by all means go ahead and scream, although you should know that the punishment stands. Oh, and if you want to have a good grade for the day I suggest you get to work on your potion, the directions are on the board."  
  
Things just kept getting better and better.

* * *

"The Headmaster would like to see you as soon as possible. Now I think I have the right to know where you were all night, seeing as I was out looking for you." Said Snape.  
  
He could ask all the questions he liked, but it didn't mean I would answer truthfully, or at all.  
  
"No, fine then you can tell me on the way to the Headmaster's office. Please refrain from lying. I should warn you that both the Headmaster and I are very able Occulmists, so we do know when we are being lied to. I will walk you to the Headmaster."  
  
"What don't you trust me?" I said smiling.  
  
"I believe you are intelligent enough to know the answer to that." with that said he opened the dungeon door and led the way to my grandfather's office.  
  
Once we reached the stone gargoyle Snape said, "Pumpkin juice" and the gargoyle jumped aside. When we reached the door Snape knocked.  
  
"Come in" came the serene voice of my grandfather. Snape opened the door. He pushed me in first. I stumbled as I clumsily entered. I saw my grandfather sitting at his desk and Professor McGonagall standing to the right of him.  
  
"Please sit down Lydia." he said while motioning to a chair in front of his desk.  
  
I did as I was told and noticed that Snape just hung around in the back. I assumed he would stay to listen what would be said.  
  
"Well I will assume that you will not speak first, even though there is a lot that we must discuss. Let us start from the beginning. Where were you when the feast was being held."  
  
"I had a stomach ache. I was resting in the bathroom. I was too sick to be hungry."  
  
"You did not have breakfast this morning either. Are you hungry now?" he said this with concern. I did my best to stare at the lovely carpet that he had. It was blue and felt springy when you walked.  
  
"No, thank you." Professor McGonagall and Snape were silent. "Well I'm sure Professor Snape told you that he found me in the bathroom on the second floor. I told him I was ill and then I went to go to see Madame Pomfrey."  
  
"Yes from there I heard you went up to your dormitory to sleep. Which then brings us up to a second topic. Now you may speak to me as a grandfather and not as a headmaster. I can assure you that if you had a bad nightmare as what was said, then you should come and tell either me or your head of house."  
  
Now I looked at him. He looked sad and worried. "I won't say it was nothing, but I can't really remember it now. The thing is that this summer I had an obsession with horror films. Every once in a while I might dream about it, but I swear that this was the first time I had an episode over something." Okay, so I lied, but they wouldn't find out.  
  
"Professor Snape what do you think?" he asked.  
  
"Unless she is an expert Occulmist, I believe she is telling the truth. Has she had any lessons before?" replied Snape.  
  
"I can't detect if she is lying either. No she has never had lessons before. If she had her mother would have notified me. She always had hoped I would teacher her." thanks grandfather for speaking for me. Ignore me. Ask yourself the questions and then answer them for me. It would definitely speed things up.  
  
"Yeah, well it was a scary nightmare and I panicked so I left the tower. I went to hide in a bathroom and spent the night there." I had to speed things up, get this all over with. Although one thing did bother me, why couldn't they tell that I was lying?  
  
"Is there anything else you would like to say to us. Such as which bathroom were you hiding in because all the bathrooms were searched, and you were not in any of them." he removed his glasses and wiped them, then he sighed. "You are not going to speak any further are you?" he looked at me when he said that.  
  
"No"  
  
"I will make you a deal. If you accept you punishment quietly, then you will not have to explain anything at all."  
  
"Sure, no problem." I said, it sounded easier than talking. What a relief.  
  
"You did not let me finish. Should this ever happen again, and I have a feeling it will, you will come straight to me instead of running off. What ever frightened you can be dealt with, you just have to come and ask for help." now he stood up, walked around his desk and held his hand out to me as he said, "Now do we have an agreement?"  
  
What else could I do? I didn't want help from anybody. I didn't need it. I shook his hand.  
  
"Now your punishment will be very severe, seeing as you broke many school rules. Three weeks detention, fifty house points from Gryffindor, and Professor Snape asked personally for your help, three weeks of assisting Snape with his potion making. I believe some other students already help him with that, but he says he needs more." said my grandfather.  
  
"Normally it counts as extra credit work, but seeing as I lost time searching for you I think that will make up for it." said Snape. Stupid bastard.  
  
"Your house will find out about thenumber of points lost, that you have caused it, and you will be the one to tell them about it. You may do it tonight after dinner." said McGonagall.  
  
"Okay," very lame I know, but what else could I have said.  
  
"Very well now it is time for lunch." after my grandfather said that he stood up and motioned for all of us to leave.

* * *

I didn't go to lunch. I went up to my room. When I got there I knelt down by my trunk and pulled out my little journal and my knife. I had a little private place at the far end of the castle near the end of the lake. As I walked down there I saw a tide of students making there way to the Great Hall. Out the great front doors I walked absorbed in my own thoughts. Maybe if I wasn't so pensive I would have noticed the person following me. When was only a few yards way from my place I heard a voice in my head.  
  
_Where could she be wondering off too?  
_  
I gasped, then turned around. I saw that Malfoy had been following me while I had walked outside. As soon as he realized that I saw him he turned around and ran. That asshole had been following me! And what was that voice that I had heard in my head?  
  
Oh well, I curled in a shady spot with my journal and my knife.

* * *

OK yes I am aware that was no the best chapter. I didn't make the conference to long w/ details b/c I didn't think they were that important to the story. I've been very busy lately w/ stuff so I am sorry that it took so long to update. Chapter 5 is in the works. I want to post it by next week. I'm going to change my summery and maybe even the title. I also want to change the genre b/c it is so many things. I don't know if I want a romance btw Malfoy and Lydia, but I am open to suggetions. If there is anything that you find wrong, or you just don't like it then let me know. The rating is staying a R b/c I will put alot of languege, and maybe buring or cutting.

Thank you to **killrgcriotgirl** and **Queen of Serpents** for being the best reviwers.


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